Comments on: Christmas Dating in Japan

By: Love online

Love online — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 01:13:51 +0000

It all sounds so shallow. I would find it a real turn off. It almost implies that she is looking for a meal ticket rather than a relationship. I dont know what the social implications of divorce are in Japan but I suspect that could be where these kinds of relationships end up.

By: Mike

Mike — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 13:40:11 +0000

Sure thing Julie :) Always a pleasure to know people are enjoying my posts. Keep up the good work yourself!

By: Julie

Julie — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 12:30:06 +0000

Hello!
This is Julie (I took the picture of the Christmas love hotel on your blog. I found it while I was walking in Osaka last year.)

I was surprised to see the photo I took featured on your blog. Thanks for linking to me. I read your site sometimes, so I’m happy that you know about mine. I read the Blog Matsuri posts and they were really interesting.

I was wondering if I could ask you a favor. Would you please add my site to your blogroll? I am trying to get more traffic to my site. If you like my blog and you add it, it would be so helpful because your blog is popular and people may find my site through yours. If you don’t want to do that, though, I understand. Either way, I’ll continue to read and enjoy this site.
Take care,
Julie

By: Chris White

Chris White — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 23:27:12 +0000

Date boys:) My Japanese boyfirend actually prefers NOT to receive presents at all. It’s much more cost-effective!

By: Mike

Mike — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 14:08:52 +0000

Thanks for your reply Sammy.

Good points as well. I think you’re right that fear is definitely a big factor in the whole present-buying process and is the case in many societies. The difference I felt in Japan, however, was that buying an expensive gift was to an extent institutionalised. It could be summed up in that wonderful expression 暗黙の了解 (anmoku no ryoukai) – a tacit understanding and acceptance of the required thing to do in a given situation.

What I guess I’m supposing is that, in Japan, the majority will think that buying an expensive gift is ‘normal’ and the ‘done thing’. Perhaps WhatJapanThinks has a survey to back this up..? (It seems to be down right now, so I cannot check).

By: Sammy

Sammy — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 07:50:15 +0000

I liked your article, Mike. My view on any holiday season where consumerism is encouraged is that guys who feel pressured to buy their girlfriend – Japanese or not – an expensive gift, are ruled by fear.

It’s their fear that their girlfriend might leave them if they don’t ‘spend’ enough on them. Add to that, if their girlfriend did ever leave them, they are afraid that they couldn’t get another girlfriend who is just as beautiful and who will love them.

I agree with Danielle… “Any woman who dumps a guy because they don’t spend enough on them wasn’t worth being with in the first place.” And every guy ‘knows’ this but their fear overrides common sense!

By: Mike

Mike — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 18:52:16 +0000

Hey Jenni! Long time no see ^^

Getting married at Christmas sound idyllic too. It seems we’re moving further and further away form religion in the 21st century, and with that, the traditional meaning of Christmas. One of my philosophy teachers thinks that secularism will define the modern era.

Nice idea about surprising each other on alternate years and such. I wonder what Japanese people feel about equality in present-giving? Anyone reading, let us hear your opinion ^^.

Merry Christmas to you too! Best wishes to you, your boyfriend and your family.